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How the child learns to be afraid


Fears are like love and pain emotions necessary in the learning process And precisely, as such, they are experiences to which we are all, as human beings, predestined to live. We are all afraid, and that is inevitable.

But, when and how is fear born in childhood? Children's first experiences with fears will depend on the environment in which they live, as well as the people, parents, siblings, ... with whom they are influenced.

Parents naturally teach their children many things, and one of them is fear. Although for them, this teaching is seen as a form of protection for their child. For example, if the child looks out of the window or gets under the legs of a horse, at first, the child is not afraid of anything. Only if you hurt him will he learn and be afraid.

The fear is related to a behavior of another person. When a child is injured, he experiences a sensation of pain, but when he is going to live a risky situation and someone warns him with exaltation of the danger, the child will stop to think and be afraid. And that is emotion.

Fear is not a direct experience of the child. Pain yes. Pain is a direct learning and therefore the child knows exactly what will happen. The fear is indirect, therefore, you do not know what will happen.

Childhood fear will disappear when there is someone to dissolve it. It is clear that you have to be afraid. It is necessary to survive, differentiate reality from fantasy and fear real risk situations such as jumping out of the window, flying out or being a superhero.

It is necessary to add that the differences to live the fears will always be individual and very personal because there will be children who, even learning from real situations with the fears of their parents, are more risky than others and, therefore, are less fearful. And there is no fear for them, but rather teach them their limits. Like, for example: the one who cannot have wings to fly like Superman, etc.

Fear is like a 'weird neighbor' who settles in the house. If it is well received it will surely stay. It is like a magician. If you take away the magic, he will lose his charm and he will cease to be a wizard. To fear, you have to take away the power. And the power is always for something that we do not know. The magic wand is ignorance. Therefore, it is necessary to explain, in a logical way, what causes fear to the one who feels it.

It is essential for anyone who wants to dissolve the fear of a child, love it, believe it, and be convinced that they can do it. There are different fears in childhood. But, in all cases, it is easier to explain fear as if it were a magician, a neighbor, something strange, but collective, so that the child understands it better.

Children 4-5 years:
Tell a story by inventing something, an object closer and familiar to the child, which is like a magic wand to give security. Example: in the story of Dumbo. It gave him more security to know 'that to fly he only had to carry the magic feather'. So Dumbo lost his fear of flying.

Children 6 to 7 years:
Accompany the child in fear. Make you feel safe. Put humor and / or games. Examples: flashlight play in the dark. If the child imagines the presence of witches and / or monsters, in his room at night, play with him during the day, turning off the lights in the room and pretending to be a detective, or a pirate in search of treasure. Thus, little by little, your child will get used to the dark.

Children from 8 to 10 years:
At these ages, fear can be explained and the child can be given autonomy to resolve them. The child has to get involved. Feel involved and love it. Feeling that your fear is meaningless. The child must be induced to find his own solution.

It is essential that you are convinced that your fear has to end. If he continues to be afraid and you see that it is harming him in his studies and in his daily life, seek the help of a specialist in psychology.

You can read more articles similar to How the child learns to be afraid, in the category of Fears on site.


Video: Im Not So Scared. I Love to Learn: A song for kids who are afraid of the dark, preschool songs (January 2022).